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快樂是選擇

放大字體  縮小字體 發布日期:2009-04-06
核心提示:We want it. We strive for it. We envy others who have it. We can see it just beyond the horizon as soon as we get richer, thinner, married, divorced, younger, older, find a dream job, or quit a lousy one. Yet, how many people do you know who have ev


We want it. We strive for it. We envy others who have it. We can see it just beyond the horizon …as soon as we get richer, thinner, married, divorced, younger, older, find a dream job, or quit a lousy one.

Yet, how many people do you know who “have everything” and still yearn for true happiness? The kind of happiness I'm talking about is that kind that comes from within and is not based on status, position, wealth, or possessions. It's a natural resource that is readily available to all. Happiness is a choice.

It had previously been thought that the brain is unchanged by life experiences. Recent breakthroughs in psychology, neurology, and chemistry have revealed that Happiness is attainable, and the brain can actually change as a result of conscious selection of thoughts.

Experts in the field have given Happiness a nickname -- “subjective well-being.” One person's Hell may be Paradise for another. For example, bungee jumping would be sheer torture for me to endure. For a thrill-seeker friend of mine, this activity represents ultimate joy. Clearly our set points are based on different subjective criteria.

Each of us is born with a genetically coded happiness “set point” which is not based entirely on what happens to us. This explains why some people are naturally cheerful most of the time, while others walk around with a permanent scowl on their faces – determined in part by their genetic predisposition. However, according to University of Minnesota professor emeritus of psychology David Lykken, “Happiness is genetically influenced, although it is not genetically fixed. The brain's structure can be modified through practice. If you really want to be happier than your grandparents provided for in your genes, you have to learn the kinds of things you can do, day by day, to bounce your set point up and avoid the things that bounce it down.”

A study conducted with identical twins raised in different environments suggests that an individual's set point determines about 50% of their disposition to Happiness. In other words, some people are happy , regardless of their less-than-ideal circumstances, while others are unhappy , even when they seem to “have it all.”

According to Ed Diener, a professor of psychology at the University of Illinois and coeditor of the Journal of Happiness Studies , a number of tools can be used to raise subjective well-being. Here are some examples:

·Getting enough sleep

·Getting enough exercise

·Nurturing close relationships -- connection, physical touch

·Maintaining an optimistic outlook – choosing positive thoughts

·Keeping a gratitude journal

·Forgiving others and letting go

·Put on a happy smile!

Even in the midst of hardship, one can experience simple pleasures by using some of the tools listed above.

快樂是選擇每個人都想快樂。我們追求快樂。我們嫉妒擁有快樂的人。當我們變得富裕或苗條,當我們經歷了結婚或離婚,當我們變得年老或年輕,找到夢想中的工作或辭掉不適的工作,……我們能看見幸福就在眼前。

是的,你見過多少擁有一切,卻渴望真正快樂的人?我所說的幸福是來自內心的幸福,而絕非建立在地位、職務、財富或財產之上的。它是每個人都能擁有的最自然的精神財富。因為幸福是一種選擇。

先前人們認為,人的智力不會因生活的經歷而改變。然而最近來自心理學、神經學和化學的突破成就揭示著幸福是可以獲得的,人的智力實際上也可以根據思維的自覺選擇結果而改變。

這方面領域的專家給幸福起了個外號叫“主觀存在”。一個人的地獄可以成為另外一個人的天堂。例如,蹦極對我來說是一個難以忍受的極度折磨。而對于尋求刺激的我的一個朋友來說,這項運動是無限的樂趣。很明顯,我們的出發點建立在不同的主觀標準。

我們每個人生來帶著已經遺傳編碼的幸福出發點,它們建立在一切發生在我們身上的事情上。這可以解釋為什么有一些人是在大多數時間里是自然心情愉快的,而其他有一些人臉上帶著那固有的怒視---這部分受他們由基因決定的易患病的體質。

根據Minnesota 大學心理學教授David Lykken的話,“幸福是受基因影響的,雖然它并不是完全穩定的。大腦的結構在生活實踐的過程中被修改。如果真的想比基因能夠提供的程度還要快樂,那你得必須學會做一些事情。日復一日,來提高你的出發點,避免那些使你感到不快的事情。” 一個涉及在不同環境下成長的一對同卵雙生雙胞胎的研究表明:個體的視角出發點決定50%的樂天性格。也就是說,一些人是快樂的,無論他們所處的環境如何;相反,一些人是不快樂的,盡管他們看上去擁有一切。

據Illinois大學心理學教授兼幸福學說期刊編輯 Ed Diener所表示,提高主觀意識并不是沒有辦法。以下是若干例子。

1. 保證充分的睡眠。

2. 保證充分的運動。

3. 培養親密關系----通過聯系或肌膚接觸。

4. 保持樂觀向上的態度----選擇積極的想法

5. 堅持寫包含感激的日記。

6. 寬恕他人并忘記不好的事情。

7. 臉上始終帶著微笑。無論是在多么難以煎熬的時期,通過這些方法,我們可以感受簡單的快樂。


 

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