While explaining stress management to an audience, the lecturer raised a glass of water and asked ‘How heavy is this glass of water?’ Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.

The lecturer replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you’ll have to call an ambulance. In each case, it’s the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”

He continued, “And that’s the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won’t be able to carry on.”

“As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we’re refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.”

“So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down. Don’t carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you’re carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can.”

Here are 5 simple ways to increase your peace of mind:

1. Do your most daunting task first thing in the morning

It’s tempting to start your day with easy tasks. Don’t. Pushing a daunting task back is like holding a glass of water in an outstretched arm. At first nothing happens, but if you do it for hours or even days, you will soon feel the stress. Do the most annoying task first thing in the morning, and enjoy increased productivity and peace of mind for the rest of the day.

2. Let go of things you don’t control

You make plans to go outside with friends. But at the last minute, it starts raining. What’s your reaction?

Some people upset and angry, and find the nearest person and start complaining to them. “It’s not FAIR that it’s raining. This _always_ happens to me!…”

That’s not going to accomplish anything - the rain won’t stop just because you throw a tantrum. *The rain doesn’t care.* So make the best of the situation. What I do in such situation is go for a quick walk in the park (because rain has its own awesomeness), or just lie in bed reading a good Terry Pratchett book, listening to the rain beating on my window.

Make the most of what you do control, and don’t worry about what you don’t.

3. Don’t worry about what others are thinking

I used to be very self-conscious about my dancing. I would rarely go out with my friends, and even if I did, I wouldn’t dance, instead just standing awkwardly by the side, because I was worried of what others would think.

Then, one day in high school, I decided that enough was enough. So the next time I went out with my friends, I just went to the dance floor, and danced like nobody was watching. And the funny thing was - nobody cared. In fact, people only liked me MORE, because I was having fun.

Don’t worry about what others are thinking of you - most likely they’re too busy wondering what others are thinking of them.

4. List 3 things you love about your situation right now

I first shared this technique with the Positivity Blog readers in my post The Plague of Happiness Ever After (it’s got a dragon and everything in it, read it!)

Just list 3 simple things about any part of your life that you love. Like “3 simple things I love about the room I’m in right now”, or “3 simple things I love about this week”, or anything else.

This is a great technique if you’re ever bored while stuck in traffic, or waiting in the grocery store checkout lane. You can immediately transform boredom into happiness and peace of mind!

5. Walk to a window, look outside, and take a single deep breath

I got this technique from the Zen master Mary Jaksch. Just walk to a window, look outside, and then take a single deep breath, focusing only on that breath and nothing else in the whole world. This technique sounds extremely simple, but you won’t believe how much it can instantaneously increase your peace of mind.

And because this is the last tip, you can try it immediately when you finish reading this blog post. Just walk to a window, look outside, and take a single deep breath, focusing on the air going in and out of your lungs, and nothing else.

   當向聽眾解釋壓力管理的時候，講師拿起一杯水問道：這杯水有多重？20克到500克眾說紛紜。

講師回答說：實際有多重并不重要，這要看我拿著它的時間。一分鐘，沒有問題。如果一個小時呢，我的右臂就會疼痛。再進一步，一天，你應該給我叫救護車了。當然每種情況下杯子的重量是相同的，但是我拿的越久，它就顯得越沉。

他繼續說道：這就像壓力管理，如果總是懷揣沉重的負擔，隨著壓力越來越大，遲早我們會崩潰掉。

正如這杯水一樣，你需要放下它休息一下，調整自己，繼續前行。

所以，今晚在各位回家之前，放下工作上的負擔。不要把它帶到家里去，你可以明天繼續肩負。無論你背負怎樣的負擔，如果可能，暫時忘掉它們。

這里有5個簡單的方法，能為你帶來平靜的心情。

1.將最艱巨的任務放在早晨。

人們總是傾向于用簡單的任務開始一天的工作，別這樣做。將艱巨的任務拖到后面就像你伸開手臂舉著杯子，開始沒什么，但是隨著時間的推移，你會很快感覺到壓力。將最艱巨的任務放在早晨，這樣你就能享受到效率提升及一天中剩下時間的平靜帶來的愜意。

2.放開你不能控制的事情

你可朋友計劃好外出，但是最后關頭下雨了，這時你會怎么想？

有些人會因此而失望、憤怒，然后跟周圍的人抱怨：這不公平，為什么這種事總是讓我遇到！

沒什么可抱怨的，雨不會因為你抱怨而停止，老天才不在乎。這種情況下我會到公園里散步（因為雨也很有魅力），或者躺在床上一邊讀Terry Pratchett的書，一邊聽著雨水打在窗戶上的聲音。

將你能掌控的事情做到最好，但也不用太在意不能左右的事情。

3.不必擔心別人的想法

我曾經對自己的舞技感到非常羞愧，因此很少與朋友外出。即使出去我也不跳舞，僅僅笨笨的站在一邊。因為我擔心別人嘲笑。

然而有一天我在學校里重重的下了決心，決定要改變這一現狀。下一次和朋友們出去的時候，我走進了舞池，旁若無人的跳舞。有意思的是并沒有人注意到我。實際上他們還想看我再跳，因為覺得我有意思。

不要擔心別怎么看你，可能他們還在擔心別人會怎么看他們呢

4.列出3件你喜愛的事情

我是在Positivity Blog中的The Plague of Happiness Ever After文章中第一次和讀者分享這個技巧的。

僅僅是列出生活中你喜愛的3件簡單的事情，如：這個屋子我最喜歡的3個地方，或這個星期我最喜歡的3件事，或是其他的什么。

在你堵車或排隊而感到無聊的時候這個技巧就會顯得尤為有用，你能立即把無聊的感覺一掃而光，取而代之的是幸福和平靜。

5 走向窗前望向窗外，深呼吸。

我從禪師Mary Jaksch那里學到的這個技巧。僅僅是走向窗前望向窗外，深呼吸。將注意力集中到這次呼吸上并忘掉其他的一切。這聽起來及其簡單，但是你很難想象這樣做能立即給你帶來平靜的心情。

這也是最后一個技巧，你可以在讀完這篇文章后馬上試一試。忘掉一切，體會空氣在肺里的進出。